Monday, April 15, 2013

# Mild-Mannered Mondays # Monday Musings

Grandmas With Guns: My Week in Review

Last week, while I was ironically blogging about good luck, was the kind I could never write about in a novel, or else my editor would force me to change it because fiction should be at least SOMEWHAT believable. All I can say is, "Thank heavens for grandmas with guns."

And yes, I mean that literally.

Perhaps this post would be better as a WTH Wednesday feature, but just to get this streak of craziness into the past tense, let's get it out now.

The Grandma Thing

My husband was shopping with our daughter when he was confronted by three very large and equally angry males just outside a fabric store. They were apparently retaliating against the store for a No Soliciting sign they'd just erected.  The guys came at Mike and Bri, yelling foul and racial comments. Mike ordered Bri to RUN into the store, which she did, crying and terrified. He and other bystanders (cowering inside the store) were all calling 911, but he knew he would be assaulted-probably severely-before anyone could intervene.

Enter the Dragon. I mean, the Grandma. 

Out from the store marches an old woman with her hand in her purse. "Is there going to be a problem here?" she demanded of the attackers. "Because I have a gun in my purse, and I WILL shoot you." Bad guys took off running, the day was saved, and Grandma hopped into her Mercedes and drove away without another word. (Whoever you were, THANK YOU a hundred times over.)

Honestly, at a FABRIC store? In broad daylight?

This was by far the craziest thing in our week, but hardly the only one. That brush with near crime was joined by others:

1. Mike accidentally caught someone breaking into carports at our complex and was threatened (again, broad daylight).
2. His car was nearly stolen (broken into, steering wheel club pried off, but couldn't defeat our security system).
3. A random drunk started banging on the car hood and shouting at a fast food drive-through 
4. MY car was nearly stolen and found with the hood popped open (since the thief couldn't get it started-more on that in a minute).
5. Our car was almost run off the road.
6. We saw our neighbor digging through our mail (just tossed in the garbage).

These miscreants wouldn't have pulled such crap on Grandma Gunslinger, I'll bet. Has the whole planet gone wonky or what? And beyond the near-crime spree, my car broke down (but at least that foiled the thieves), taxes were a load of OMG, and oh, yes, Bri just came down sick...AGAIN. 

Okay, now THAT'S off my chest. How about the flip side report? Starting off with this cute photo of Bri in the costume Daddy made despite the fabric store debacle. She won a contest in her girl Robin outfit--and also beat Superman at arm wrestling. LOL

I spent the week pushing up word count on DIS____? COWBOYS, the as-yet-unnamed Book 6 of my LONE WOLVES OF SHAY FALLS series. So for you fans who have been wondering when the next installment will be written, I'm on it! (And be sure to click on the poll at right to choose your favorite title.) Zane and Jayson are hot 'n' fine cowboys--and one of them has some Indian thrown in! 

I've also been running around promoting on hops and the social nets, and I finally got around to signing up on Goodreads. If you're over there, please gimme a shout! And after some thought, I decided to pledge a larger bulk of my social networking time to Twitter. You can follow me there at

This week, I'll be focusing on some spring cleaning, getting Bri healthy again, deciding what to do about my car, and more writing/promo. And just maybe wondering whether we can hire Grandma back as a personal security detail.

OH, and my April commenting contest is still in effect! Post a comment for a chance to win a $25 Bath & Body Works Gift Card. Have a happy week!


On Mondays, I gab about whatever. For more gab, please join me on Twitter or Goodreads. I love talking to people!

J. Rose Allister is the author of more than twenty-five books, primarily romance and erotic romance. A former editor and submissions director, she now works as a mild-mannered hospital secretary by day, naughty writer by night.


  1. Nice blog! I found your great blog through the WLC Blog Follows on the World Literary Cafe. Great to connect! Stop by to say hello :)

  2. I found your great blog through the WLC Blog Follows on the World Literary Cafe! Great to connect! I hope you stop by to visit me at

  3. Wow, I'll have to start visiting some fabric stores, sounds exciting!
    Thanks for stopping by my blog from the WLC. I enjoyed reading your posts and I'll come by again soon.

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